Only Fools and Horses S04E02 — Strained Relations

Every line from “Strained Relations” (671 quotes). Click one to open the meme editor on the exact frame, ready to caption and share.

Only Fools and Horses S04E02 meme — “Rodney, you go and lock up.”

00:03♫ Stick a pony in me pocket
00:07♫ I'll fetch the suitcase from the van
00:10♫ 'Cos if you want the best ones
00:12♫ But you don't ask questions
00:14♫ Then brother, I'm your man
00:18♫ 'Cos where it all comes from is a mystery
00:21♫ It's like the changing of the seasons
00:23♫ And the tides of the sea
00:26♫ But here's the one that's driving me berserk
00:29♫ Why do only fools and horses work
00:33♫ La la la
00:34♫ La la la la
00:44(birds cawing)
01:08- All right, Trig?
01:08- Yeah, I'm all right.
01:11Um...
01:14Well.
01:17Uh.
01:18- Yes, all right, I know Trig, I know mate.
01:23You going back to the flat, are you?
01:25- Yeah, I'm coming back.
01:25- Yeah.
01:27Do us a favor will you?
01:29Go and open up.
01:31Yeah, I got one or two things to do.
01:34Gotta bung the vicar a couple of quid, that sort of thing.
01:37Um, see the three over there?
01:41They're the North London branch of the family.
01:44Make 'em welcome, will ya?
01:47Keep your eye on them, eh?
01:49- Yeah, sure.
01:51- Thanks.
01:52Cheers, Trig.
02:08(blows nose)
02:15- I love a nice funeral.
02:19- Why don't you hang about, there's two more after this.
02:34(blows nose)
03:06- Sorry.
03:37- We'll leave the car shall we, eh?
03:40- Yeah. (sniffs)
03:42We'll have a nice little walk, eh?
03:45- Yeah.
03:47Come on, let's have a nice walk, eh?
03:48Come on.
03:56Oi!
03:58Gently.
04:10- Well Michael, how's business in the pub?
04:14- Oh, Not bad Boycie, not bad.
04:16Oh, you didn't hear, did you?
04:17Thursday night some berk nicked me cigarette machine.
04:20- Never! - Yeah.
04:21- What about that sonic burglar alarm Del Boy sold ya?
04:24- Oh yeah.
04:25They nicked that and all.
04:28(Boycie laughing)
04:32(Boycie coughs)
04:38- Just make some excuse, Stan.
04:40Say we're in a hurry or something.
04:42- But it's a funeral, love.
04:44- We've gotta get all the way back to North London.
04:47If we don't leave now we'll cop the rush hour.
04:50- Look, I don't wanna go back to their flat either, Jean,
04:52but I'm family.
04:54- I wanna go back there.
04:56He was my brother.
04:58- It's got nothing to do with you Uncle Albert,
04:59so stay out of it.
05:01- What do you mean he was your brother?
05:02You and him didn't talk to each other for years.
05:05- Me and your Aunt Ada didn't talk to each other for years,
05:08but she was still me wife.
05:11- Come on, we'll go back for a half hour, show our respect.
05:15Anyway, we'd only have him whining all the way home.
05:21Don't you dare light that pipe in my car.
05:27- It was a lovely service, Vicar.
05:29- Thank you very much, thank you.
05:34Oh, has anyone seen my hat?
05:36It was here.
05:45- Right, here we go, here you are love.
05:46Come on, come on, get stuck in here, will you?
05:48- Ooh, lovely, thank you.
05:50- Where's the cake and candles, Del?
05:52- The what?
05:53- No matter.
05:55- Wait.
05:57- So the Chinese bird says to him,
05:59"Listen, I ain't cooking at this time of night."
06:01(Boycie and Mike laugh)
06:05- Was that true?
06:06- Oh, have a day off, Trigger.
06:17- Well, everyone seems to be enjoying themselves, eh Trig?
06:20- Yeah, it's a good do, Dave.
06:20- Yeah.
06:23I don't believe you mob sometimes.
06:27You got any fags on you, Trig?
06:29- Yeah.
06:37What sort d'you fancy?
06:38- Any'll do.
06:40- Here we are.
06:42Keep 'em, I've got loads.
06:44- Cheers.
06:45- Cheers, Dave.
06:48- Rodney, innit?
06:49- Well, it is when Trigger ain't about, yeah.
06:51- Uncle Albert.
06:53Well Great Uncle Albert really.
06:54I'm yer Grandad's brother.
06:56- Yeah, yeah, he told me about you.
06:58But, you know, I don't take no notice of that sort of thing.
07:01- No, no, it's best not to, son.
07:03Shame, really.
07:04Me and him lost touch with each other years ago.
07:07I spent most of my life at sea, you know.
07:09Royal Navy, Merchant.
07:11D'you know, I was torpedoed five times.
07:13- Yeah?
07:14- Yeah.
07:15D'you know what the crews nicknamed me?
07:17- Jonah?
07:21- No, they didn't call me Jonah.
07:23Not many of them.
07:24They used to call me Boomerang Trotter,
07:27'cos I always come back.
07:28(company laughing in background)
07:29- Terrific.
07:31- Here Rodney, do me a favor will you?
07:32You know them batteries out there in the hall?
07:34Stick 'em in the corridor
07:35in case someone falls over 'em, all right?
07:36- Yeah, fine.
07:37- Oi, Rodney, wait.
07:37- 'Ere, Del, come here!
07:38Come here son, listen to this one.
07:40Go on.
07:41- Well, we'll have one more drink
07:42and get on our way, all right?
07:45- I don't like the people over this side of the river.
07:48They're not as nice as North Londoners.
07:50- You don't know what you're talking about, girl.
07:51I was born round here.
07:52- Need I say more?
07:54- You couldn't wish to meet a more honest
07:56and generous people as South Londoners.
07:58- Honest and generous?
08:00I noticed they didn't have a whip round at the cemetery.
08:02- Well they couldn't, could they.
08:04Someone nicked the Vicar's hat!
08:08- Del, Del, do you remember us?
08:09- Oh!
08:10- Cousin Stan.
08:11- Stan, yes!
08:11Yeah, of course I remember you.
08:12Yeah, I was gonna come over and have a chat with you.
08:13- This is my wife, Jean.
08:14- Oh, Jean, yeah.
08:15Hello, Jean, how are you?
08:16- This is Uncle Albert.
08:17- Oh, Uncle Albert, is it?
08:18Hello.
08:20- Your mum asked me to be your Godfather.
08:22- Oh!
08:23Yeah, I thought Uncle George was my Godfather?
08:25- Yeah, that's right.
08:26Me and him spun a coin.
08:27- George lost.
08:31- So what you up to these days, Stan?
08:32Are you still poncing around in the insurance game, are you?
08:35- Well, I'm still in the insurance business, yeah,
08:37and doing very nicely thank you.
08:38- We've got our own place, all paid for.
08:41- Oh really?
08:42What you got, a maisonette?
08:42- No, it's a mobile home, actually.
08:44- Ah, I see.
08:45You've got a caravan.
08:48- It's got two separate bedrooms, a breakfast bar,
08:50and a combined toilet and shower-room.
08:52- Oh, it's a big caravan.
08:56- Well this is just a council flat, isn't it?
08:58- Yeah, but there's no chance of this getting a puncture,
09:00is there?
09:03- He's been living with us for 18 months now.
09:05He only popped round to borrow a screwdriver.
09:08- If I hear another nautical yarn I'll swing for him.
09:12- Someone suggested an old folks home.
09:14- Well, you can't do that, he's family.
09:15- Oh, we didn't consider it, did we love?
09:18- No, of course not!
09:20Well not at them prices anyway.
09:25- You all right, son?
09:27- Yeah.
09:28- You ever been on board a ship, Rodney?
09:30- Yeah, yeah, when I was a kid.
09:33Grandad took me.
09:36- I see.
09:37Did he ever take you down and show you the engine room?
09:39- No, no, it was only the Woolwich Ferry.
09:43He got seasick.
09:45We had to go home via the Rotherhithe tunnel.
09:48- I used to work in the engine room.
09:50Maintenance, that sort of thing.
09:51Cor, them boilers took some looking out for.
09:55D'you know what the most important gadget is
09:57in the engine room?
09:59- The lock on the porthole?
10:02- No, they don't have port--
10:04It's the safety valve on the boiler.
10:07You get a build-up of pressure
10:08and the safety valves ain't working, bang!
10:12The whole gubbins explodes.
10:13You've gotta find a way of releasing the pressure.
10:17That's what's happening to Del.
10:18He's releasing the pressure.
10:20Laughter is just his safety valve, yeah.
10:24- Yeah?
10:24- Yeah.
10:25- Well, I don't think it's right.
10:27Them people laughing in there.
10:30I ain't laughing.
10:32I ain't laughing today, I ain't laughing tomorrow.
10:36I don't wanna laugh for the rest of my life.
10:39- Well, as long as you're happy, son.
10:44- I'm away now, boys, I'll see you later.
10:45- Keep it in your trousers, Michael.
10:46- I'm off now, Del, all right son?
10:47- Yeah, yeah, thanks for coming, Mike.
10:49'Ere, you're doin' a bit of a flyer ain't ya?
10:50- Well, as a sign of respect for yer grandad,
10:52I've decided to open the pub early.
10:54- Oh that's very nice of you Mike,
10:56appreciate the gesture, thanks.
10:58- Oh about the booze, it comes to 86 quid.
11:01- Please Mike,
11:03don't discuss money now.
11:06I mean you'll be offering me a discount for cash next.
11:10Won't you?
11:13- I saw the periscope half mile off starboard.
11:17I saw the wash of torpedo's fins.
11:20It caught us right at the, uh,
11:22at the pointed end, yeah.
11:24Wallop!
11:25Up it went.
11:26Foam, flame, fire, smoke, burning metal.
11:33As soon as it happened I thought to myself,
11:34"Hello, we've been hit."
11:37- I expect you get to know the little signs, eh?
11:41- Yeah, okay Mike, 'ere listen,
11:43don't worry about that burglar alarm that got nicked,
11:45'cos Trigger knows where he can get hold of another one.
11:48All right, so I'll whip it round to you okay?
11:49- Okay, cheers Del.
11:50See you, Rodney.
11:51- Yeah, bye.
11:52- Cheers.
11:53- Thanks Mike, yeah.
11:55- Del, I've just been telling young Rodney
11:56about my days in the Navy.
11:59I don't know why you don't join up.
12:01- Yeah, well you've just given me five good reasons.
12:22- Here we are!
12:22Here we go Rodney, look specialty of the house.
12:25Sausage und ala the old mash.
12:27Here you go.
12:28- I ain't really all that hungry, Del.
12:31- Oh come on, Rodders.
12:32I've been an hour out there in that kitchen cooking this.
12:35Go on, try it at least.
12:42- I can't eat that, Del.
12:44- What's wrong with it?
12:45- Well, it's nothing like Grandad's is it?
12:47It tastes nice.
12:52- I tried to mess it up, honest I did, Rodney.
12:55Just didn't have his knack.
12:58Do you know he was taught to cook
12:59at one of London's biggest establishments?
13:02- You're kidding.
13:03- No, straight up.
13:04He was a trainee chef at the Ear, Nose and Throat Hospital.
13:10Now, come on then.
13:12Come on, let's give this a hiding, Shall we?
13:14- Yeah, why not?
13:15- Yeah, that's it.
13:16(clanging noise)
13:19Well it's just...
13:20it's just us two now, bruv.
13:22Me and you against the rest.
13:26Ah, don't stand a bloody chance do they, eh?
13:28(clanging noise)
13:33- Del?
13:33- Yeah?
13:34- Someone's trying to pull our lavatory chain.
13:38- Yeah, I know.
13:40I know it's an awkward one innit?
13:41The secret is one slow pull and then a sharp one like that.
13:46(lavatory chain being pulled hard, toilet flushing)
13:49There you go.
13:49There it is, see?
13:52- What I'm saying is, right...
13:53- Yeah?
13:54- We're the only ones in the flat
13:57and someone's trying to flush our lav.
14:02- Oh, yeah, well maybe it's a washer or something.
14:06- How can a bloody washer pull the chain?
14:10- I don't know, do I?
14:11I am not a scientist or something, am I?
14:13No, it's all right, it's probably something, you know,
14:16quite simple.
14:18You know, nothing...
14:20Nothing at all really.
14:22Where's my bloody hammer?
14:28- Del!
14:36- Oh my bloody head.
14:37- Gordon Bennett.
14:39You nearly had your head caved in then,
14:40you soppy old sod!
14:42- I had too much of that cognac.
14:45Where is everyone?
14:47- Well, they've all gone home, haven't they?
14:48It's half past 11 at night.
14:51- Where the hell have you been?
14:52- I conked out in one of them beds.
14:54Cor, my belly's going round and round.
14:58Oh my God.
15:01Half past 11?
15:03D'you think Stan and Jean'll be worried about me?
15:05- Worried about you?
15:08Yeah, well of course they'll be worried about you,
15:10won't they.
15:12Well, look, we can't drive you back there tonight now.
15:15No, me and Rodney have had enough to drink.
15:18- What about a minicab then?
15:20- No, you won't get one now Rodney,
15:21they'll be busy washing out their backseats.
15:26What I reckon is you've got to stay here tonight
15:28and I'll drive you back to North London tomorrow, right?
15:30Rodney, you go and lock up.
15:31Oi, make sure you bring them batteries in
15:33before someone swipes 'em, all right?
15:34- No one's gonna nick them, Del.
15:37- Really, how d'you think we got 'em?
15:41- I appreciate this, son.
15:42- Ah forget it, I'll get you a pillow and some blankets
15:44and you can make yourself a bed there on the chaise lounge,
15:46all right?
15:47- 'Ere, I won't be able to sleep on there Del.
15:49I need a good firm mattress.
15:52I've got a curvature of the spine, see.
15:54- Really?
15:55It's all them years sleeping in an hammock I suppose, is it?
15:57- Yeah.
15:59I might as well kip down in there, eh?
16:01- No, no, you can't go in there,
16:02that's my Grandad's room.
16:03- Yeah, but I'm his brother.
16:05- Yeah, that don't make no difference.
16:06Only me and Rodney are allowed in that room.
16:09That room is gonna remain exactly as he left it.
16:13That room is going to be a shrine
16:15dedicated to the memory of my grandfather.
16:20- I understand Del.
16:22- No, we'll just have to think of something else,
16:23that's all.
16:24Listen, if I get the big mattress out of Rodney's room,
16:26I can put it down there.
16:27No, I'd never get it through the door would I?
16:30- Oi, where'd you want these then?
16:32- Oh, sling 'em in Grandad's room for now, will you, Rodney?
16:48- All right?
16:49Did you get Albert home safely?
16:51- Yeah, I got him home safely all right, Rodney.
16:56- Morning, son.
16:57- Morning.
17:00You're back?
17:02- Boomerang Trotter always comes back.
17:04- What happened?
17:06- What happened?
17:07I'll tell you what happened!
17:08I drove him all the way back to North London,
17:10right through the bleedin' rush hour.
17:12And what did we find when we got there?
17:13Stan and Jean have moved.
17:18- Moved?
17:20What do you mean moved?
17:21- What do you mean what do I mean?
17:24They hooked the caravan on the back of the Cortina
17:25and they've had it away!
17:28- This was lying where the caravan once stood.
17:31It's just me clothes and a few personal belongings.
17:35- You mean that's all you've got in the world?
17:37- No, no, we've gotta go back tomorrow
17:38to pick up his parrot.
17:41How could they do this to me, eh?
17:43- That is disgusting innit?
17:45I mean, deserting him like that.
17:47- Yeah, it ain't the first time it's happened, either.
17:50- I mean, I, think there should be a law
17:51or something against that.
17:52- Yeah, I know.
17:53All I wanna know is where they've got--
17:56'Ere, what did you say just then?
17:58- I said it ain't the first time it's happened either.
18:01D'you remember your cousin Audrey?
18:03I went and stayed with her and her husband Kevin for a year.
18:06One day they sent me down to Sainsbury's
18:08with a shopping list.
18:09When I come back they'd emigrated.
18:13Not a dicky bird to me though.
18:16Then there was young Gillian, you know, Patsy's girl.
18:19I went over there to give her a bit of comfort
18:20'cos her husband was on nights.
18:23Six months later she sets fire to the house.
18:27She got three months medical supervision for that.
18:30I can remember thinking as I stood on the ledge
18:32and jumped into the fireman's net,
18:34"That's gratitude for you!"
18:40- Now I've got a funny feeling, Del.
18:44- So have I, Rodney.
18:47I feel like a turkey who's just caught
18:49Bernard Matthews grinning at him.
18:55- What shall I do with these then?
18:57- I tell you what you ought to do with those, shall I?
18:59You put them in here, right?
19:00In they go, they go in there,
19:02'cos you're not staying here, all right?
19:04- No, of course not.
19:05Just for a couple of days, that's all.
19:07- No. No, no!
19:08Not for a couple of days, not for one day.
19:09There's a seaman's mission
19:10down there at St Katharine's Dock.
19:12You go down here, go on!
19:13- Well, I thought I'd just have a look at the local paper
19:16and find meself some digs.
19:17- Yeah, that's a good idea Uncle!
19:18They'll have a local paper down at the mission.
19:20Now, go on sling your hook.
19:21- Yeah, all right, Del.
19:23You don't mind if I have a quick cup of tea, do you?
19:25- No, go on there's a flask of cold tea out there
19:27and some vol-au-vents from yesterday.
19:28Go on, you can have them.
19:30- Cheers, son.
19:33- Oi.
19:34- Hmm?
19:35- What are you doing, winding him up?
19:36- Yeah, yeah, I'm winding him up aren't I?
19:39I'm winding him up.
19:41- Del, he only wants to stay for a couple of nights
19:43and get himself sorted out.
19:45- He's a Trotter, Rodney.
19:46- We're Trotters.
19:47- Yes I know, but we take after Mum in nature.
19:49He's from Dad's side of the family.
19:51You know what they're like.
19:52You offer 'em a cup of tea
19:53and they think you've adopted 'em.
19:55Look at that time when Dad came round here.
19:56He wanted to stay one night.
19:58Took us nigh on a fortnight to get rid of him.
20:06- (softly) Uncle Albert might not be like that.
20:08- Oh leave it out, Rodney.
20:10You've heard him yourself
20:11when he was telling us about that time he came round
20:12the Cape of Good Hope.
20:14He was three months on the same wave!
20:19- I don't believe you Del.
20:21I do not believe that you of all people, could...
20:27- Where do you think you're going?
20:28- I'm going down the caff!
20:29I'm gonna get some grub and some better company!
20:32(door slams)
20:37I'm gonna put some clothes on first.
21:07You've changed, Del.
21:08- Yeah, well it's about time you did.
21:09Come on, we've got to go down to the market later on.
21:11- I mean your personality has changed.
21:13I've seen a side of you I never knew existed.
21:17- You don't understand, Rodney.
21:19- You're right about that, Del!
21:21I mean, look at you.
21:22Last night, you was laughing, you was drinking.
21:25I mean, why didn't you just put your Boney M record on, Del?
21:27We could have had a good old knees-up!
21:30It was Grandad!
21:34How could you get over it so easily?
21:37- Get over it?
21:41What a plonker you really are, Rodney.
21:45Get over it?
21:47I ain't even started yet.
21:48I ain't even started, bruv.
21:50And do you know why?
21:52Because I don't know how to.
21:54That's why.
21:58I've survived all my life with a smile and a prayer.
22:00I'm Del Boy, ain't I?
22:00"Good old Del Boy, he's got more bounce than Zebedee.
22:05'Ere you are pal, what you drinking?
22:06Go on.
22:06Hello darling, you have one for luck."
22:07That's me, that's Del Boy, innit?
22:10Nothing ever upsets Del Boy.
22:13I've always played the tough guy.
22:15I didn't want to, but I had to.
22:18And I've played it for so long now
22:21I don't know how to be anything else.
22:26I don't even know how to...
22:30Oh, it don't matter.
22:33Bloody families, I've finished with 'em!
22:36What do they do to you, eh?
22:38They hold you back, drag you down,
22:44and then they break your bloody heart.
22:53- (softly) Sorry.
23:03(music plays on telly)
23:13(laughter)
23:15- All right there, all right.
23:16Hello darling.
23:18- I'll be over there.
23:18- Okay, all right.
23:19All right pal, what you drinking?
23:21Give him one.
23:22I'll have a Malibu and tonic with some lime
23:24and half a lager, please, darling.
23:25- In the same glass?
23:28- No, in separate ones, if you don't mind.
23:30- Well I don't know do I?
23:32It might have been one of your erotic cocktails, Del.
23:36- She's a saucy little cow that one, ain't she, eh?
23:38- All right Del?
23:39- Yeah, brill, terrific!
23:40How're things?
23:41- Oh you know, quiet.
23:42Here, you know that old boy that was at the funeral?
23:45Him with the beard?
23:46- Yeah.
23:47- He was here lunchtime.
23:48- Oh yeah?
23:49- What is he, a relative or something?
23:51- Nah, well yeah, I mean, he's a distant relative, yeah.
23:53- He was telling me all about his wartime dramas.
23:55Torpedoed five time, dive-bombed twice.
23:58He's a bit of a jinx isn't he?
23:59- Yeah.
24:00You know what his last job was, don't you?
24:01He was entertainment officer on the Belgrano.
24:06No, straight up.
24:08Right, cheers, darling!
24:09- One eighty, please.
24:10- All right, there you go.
24:11Go on, have one for luck.
24:12- Oh, cheers.
24:12- Oh, that reminds me Del, about all that booze yesterday?
24:14- Yeah, what about it.
24:15Went down a treat didn't it?
24:17See you later Mike.
24:22Cheers.
24:24- I wonder where he is?
24:25- Eh, who?
24:26- Uncle Albert.
24:27- Oh him, oh, well he's down the seaman's mission by now,
24:29ain't he, eh?
24:30Got himself a lovely bed, blinding little locker.
24:33Yeah, he's as happy as a pig in sugar, he is, yeah.
24:38- Yeah, I suppose so but it makes you think, don't it?
24:41I mean, a man fights for his country like that,
24:43you know, laying his life on the line.
24:47D'you know he went down with five different ships?
24:49- Yeah, I know.
24:50I don't know why he just didn't join the submarine corps
24:52in the first place.
24:56Hmm?
25:03(Uncle Albert coughs)
25:07- Hey, he's got a nasty cough, ain't he?
25:09- Yeah, pity Boots ain't open, innit.
25:19- You all right Unc?
25:20- Yeah, fine son.
25:21- Yeah, good.
25:22Did you go down the mission then?
25:23- Yeah, I went down there, but it ain't there no more.
25:26They knocked it down.
25:28Built some luxury flats and a marina.
25:32- Um, look, I ain't got very much.
25:35I've got what, two--
25:36- Oh, put yer money away Rodney.
25:38I don't want it.
25:40Thanks for the offer though.
25:43Go on, you go back to Del.
25:45Don't you worry about me.
25:47All right?
25:48Don't worry.
25:52(coughs)
26:00It's all right Rodney, nothing to worry about.
26:04It's just me lungs.
26:07We hit a mine coming back from Normandy.
26:12I was trapped for 12 hours in a smoke-filled engine room.
26:16- Oh.
26:17Well, if it's not one thing it's another, eh?
26:25- He ain't got nowhere to sleep tonight.
26:26- Hmm.
26:27- He went down the mission, it's not there any more,
26:29there's just a marina.
26:31- Well can't he kip in the back of that?
26:37- A yachting marina.
26:41Come on, Del, that's Grandad's brother sitting over there.
26:44Where do you want him to sleep, eh?
26:45A doss-house?
26:46- Listen Rodney, that bloke has been
26:47in shark-infested seas, right?
26:50He's been attacked by kamikaze pilots
26:52and blown up more times than a beach ball.
26:56One night in a doss-house ain't gonna do him any harm,
26:58is it?
27:00- You don't believe all them stories do ya?
27:04- What, do you reckon they're porkies?
27:10- Well, of course they are.
27:12I didn't wanna say nothing 'cos, you know, he's a proud man.
27:16- Oh, proud, him?
27:17He comes from Dad's side of the family, doesn't he?
27:19- No, I just offered him a couple of quid
27:20and he wouldn't take a penny.
27:22- No, well, he wouldn't would he?
27:23He's still got that hundred quid I gave him this afternoon.
27:27- You gave him an hundred pounds?
27:29- Yeah, you don't think I'd let him go potless do ya?
27:32- Is that why you can't pay Mike for the booze?
27:35- Oh come on.
27:37Come on!
27:42- All right?
27:44- Yeah, all right, son.
27:45Just having a drop of rum, warm me old cockles, yeah.
27:50- You eaten?
27:51- No, not yet.
27:53- Then why didn't you have something to eat
27:54when you was in here at lunchtime, eh?
27:56- Well, all they had left was sausage and mash
27:57and I've gone right off that.
28:02- Fancy an Indian?
28:05- Wouldn't mind, son.
28:07- Oh, we'd never get a table this time of night, Del.
28:09- No.
28:10We'll have to get a takeaway, and eat it at home.
28:15- Yeah.
28:16Yeah, that's what we'll do, we'll get a takeaway
28:18and eat it at home, eh?
28:20- It it's all right with you two, Del.
28:23Thanks.
28:25- Don't know what you're thanking me for.
28:27You're paying.
28:31Come on Sinbad, let's get down there
28:32before the health inspector.
28:40- Oi, I'm glad I caught you.
28:42I've just phoned the mission,
28:43they said they've got a bed for you.
28:44- Sh!
28:51♫ We've got some half price cracked ice
28:52♫ And miles and miles of carpet tiles
28:54♫ TV's, deep freeze and David Bowie LPs
28:57♫ Pool games, gold chains, wosnames and at a push
29:00♫ Some Trevor Francis track suits
29:02♫ From a mush in Shepherd's Bush
29:03♫ Bush Bush Bush Bush Bush Bush
29:06♫ No income tax, no VAT
29:09♫ No money back, no guarantee
29:12♫ Black or white, rich or broke
29:15♫ We'll cut prices at a stroke
29:20♫ God bless Hooky Street
29:23♫ Viva Hooky Street
29:26♫ Long live Hooky Street
29:29♫ C'est magnifique Hooky Street
29:32♫ Magnifique Hooky Street
29:37♫ Hooky Street
29:40♫ Hooky Street